When
Of course all the kids wanted to walk, which I knew would be a trial of my patience, but I said a little prayer and told myself I asked for this. I went about my shopping as quickly as possible. When I stopped the cart they all scrambled in different directions so they could make sure that their fingerprints canvassed the entire warehouse before we moved on. It didn’t matter if they were checking something ‘cool’ out (their current adjective of choice), having walking backwards races, or trying to get me to look at one of the hundreds of ‘cool’ toys they think they needed, when I was ready to go, I would just whistle and they would follow me to the next stop on our Costco list.
Yes, it’s true. Apparently I have resorted to whistling at my children. Whether this is so I don’t get confused trying to match the right kid with the right name, so I can sound so ‘cool’ that all the other parents around look at me like I have gone mad, or because I feel somewhat like a sheepherder at times, I now whistle and they know they have been summoned. I don’t know when I started this, but it must have been a while ago since they are now trained and know there will be consequences if they don’t come when they’re called.
Obviously, I’m not sure how this all started, but I think I have a good thing going. It makes for less yelling on my part and more brain for me to try to focus on what I am doing. The downside, some might say, is that I treat my children like animals. Although that might seem accurate, I would have to argue that they kind of act like animals. And since we are going with that analogy they are house-broken, immunized, and well-nourished little pups that I love the snot out of. Ew. Shouldn't that count for something?
I guess it’s better that I’ve developed a whistle instead of some other animal call. Ha! Imagine me pushing my cart down the aisle at Costco screeching like a monkey. Oh, better yet, barking like a seal. Now, that would really give people something to look at. Is my whistle really that bad?
