Nose Nonsense...

I had my follow up ENT appointment today. Looks like I will be getting a septoplasty sometime in the near future. Breathing good is nice and all, but couldn’t they at least make my schnoze look a little more flattering while I’m knocked out? I have to say I was a little disappointed since I thought that when this inevitable surgery happened one day that I would be beautified. Apparently that would involve taking my nose off my face, a hammer and chisel, two months of recovery, black eyes and thousands of dollars. Who knew? C’mon, can’t they just leave it on and whack it a little if I promised a generous tip? Septoplasty, Rhinoplasty…big difference. I bet my insurance company wouldn’t even notice. Looks like I’m stuck with my ‘when did you break your nose?’ nose. Bummer.

Have you ever heard the story about the lady who was in a terrible accident? Ok, so I am sure, unfortunately, that there have been lots of ladies in bad accidents…

After she died she told the angels waiting for her that she wasn’t ready yet. They agreed and sent her back to finish her life on earth. While in the hospital recovering, she decided that since she had a confirmation that she would be alive a while longer she might as well take advantage of the situation and get that plastic surgery done that she always wanted.

After a few more weeks recovering from her glamification, she was released from the hospital. As she was crossing the street, she stopped to admire her beautifully transformed reflection in the window of a parked car. Unfortunately, she was so taken with her image that she neglected to see the bus barreling down the street and was hit and killed.

(And you are asking yourself why I would share such a twisted story? My answer: Don’t go and get your panties in a wad just yet.)

When she got to heaven she told the angels they had made a mistake. She explained that she had just died a few weeks earlier and they sent her back because it wasn’t her time yet. The angels looked at each other amused and just said, “Aw Girl! We didn’t even recognize you!”

This makes me feel better because:

1. I have been around for 30 years with my old nose and I haven’t been all that naughty, so

I think I want to be recognized when I get hit by a bus…or whatever.

2. I think it is funny.

Oh, and I made some invitations for Ruth’s bridal shower today and despite my nose drama they turned out cute. (Oh, back off! I deserve a little tooting my own horn after all that nose-nonsense.)

tHerApY

When I was going to a counselor to help me get through my mid life crisis at 29, one of the things she recommended was that I take time out to COLOR. When I asked her to clarify, she said something to the effect of you know crayons, coloring book, staying in the lines? Apparently, coloring has some kind of soothing effect.

So today when Carter woke up grumpy as all get out I asked him if he wanted to color with me. He declined, but I decided I needed a little soothing myself. I got out the crayons and if I do say so myself, made Guido look fabuloso! It wasn’t long before Grumpy joined me. I mean, who could resist a Lightning McQueen coloring page and a crayon CAROUSEL? It worked like a charm for both of us, although I don’t know if I should be worried that the cars he colored all had really mean looking eyes. Maybe it was all part of Crayola’s letting go of the anger therapy. All I can say is that was the cheapest therapy session I ever had, and look at the excitement on that cute non-grumpy face!

rock N roll

Carter had his first day at preschool today! He looked so handsome when he left. After I got home I downloaded the pictures and I couldn’t believe how old he looks. I was fighting the tears thinking about him going to kindergarten next year! So, next year Eden and Carter will be in school and Landon will be in preschool 2 days a week…that means either I will have 2 days all by my lonesome! Oh, think of the possibilities! I love my kids, but a little break would be nice…is that selfish? Oh yeah, I am still sad about Carter growing up though.

We took Carter’s friend Wyatt to school today. They were in the same class last year and became best little buds. It was so cute to see them walking through the doors holding hands. When we got to Wyatt’s class Carter waved goodbye and walked straight to his classroom to hang up his backpack. As soon as he walked in the door he was all business. Even though I coaxed a hug and kiss out of him he gave me the “Seriously,mom?” look, so I quickly pushed his limit by taking a couple of pictures before I left my growing boy.

As I was walking back to the car I realized that Landon’s breathing was more labored than normal. I looked down to assess the situation and found it was because I was unconsciously squeezing the daylights out of the poor little guy. I guess I am not really ready for my babies to grow up after all. I decided that Landon and I were going to have fun together today, so we played puzzles, cars, had a picnic in his bedroom and went out to get ice cream. I was trying my hardest to be the fun mom, but it didn't help that he kept saying, "I WANT CARTER!" Turns out that moms can only be kinda fun compared to brothers.

Carter’s teacher, Mrs. Hinchman came to meet him at our house and brought a car poster for him to color and a ball. Smart lady to come bearing gifts! That night at dinner, Damian was asking him if he liked his teacher. Carter said, “She is so cool.” His response when we asked him what made her so cool? “Because she has rock n’roll hair!”

rOaDies...

We spent the morning visiting with Grandmother and Pops before they cruised home on their motorcycle. They just bought their Honda Goldwing in the middle of June, and it already has almost 10,000 miles on it! Randy and Kris took a 3,700 mile trip back East, and Randy just got back from his cross country trip to Banff, Canada. I think he rode around 5,700 miles on that one. We got to see some pictures of his trip…so beautiful! Talk about die-hards? Who would have known that my in-laws would be the motorcycle ridin’ type? I think Kris needs some leather pants to fit the image! We had a fun weekend having them in town, and Pops played along when he took us each for a ride.

For Labor Day we went to a birthday party. It was a family pool party. We all had a blast, even though I wasn’t feeling like shimmying into my bathing suit. It was fun to visit with friends we don’t get to see near as often as we’d like. The kids turned into little fish this summer, and I was having a hard time convincing them to get out of the pool. We were one of the last ones to leave.

As I got up to go find my hubby and all our gear, I had the feeling that I needed to stay by the pool. Even though the kids were just in the shallow end, I thought I better not ignore the prompting. I am so glad I didn’t, because five minutes later Carter and his little friend were clinging to each other as they struggled to get a breath. They had gone down the slide and landed together and wouldn't let go of each other to swim to the side. It was probably only a couple of seconds before I realized what was happening, but it felt like forever until I got to them. I remember thinking to myself, “Aw, c’mon! Seriously? Are there no other adults around in swimming suits?” (I know, that was naughty and selfish!) Answering my own question, I jumped in fully clothed. I was so grateful I was there, that I listened to the prompting that I know came from God who was watching over two of his children!

walkin' in my sleep!

Landon is 29 months old and still sleeps in his crib. I don’t know if he is trying to tell us something or he is actually sleep walking, but we find him curled up on the floor anywhere between his bed and ours. He used to try to get in bed with us, but we vetoed him enough that if he makes it all the way to the foot of our bed he just cozies up with a piece of carpet. This really isn’t really a problem unless we step on him, which is inevitable at some point.

I am a little concerned that he might roll down the stairs too. We have found both him and Carter curled up snoozing on a stair in the middle of the night too. So, the debate continues…big boy bed or crib. Of course, Damian is against the big boy bed which would mean purchasing a new bed.

These are pictures I took of Landon today during nap time. I was on the computer in the kitchen when he came staggering down with blankies in tow. Without saying anything to me he laid down on the carpet was back to snoozing in no time…crazy boy!

To Sneeze or not to Sneeze...

I had an interesting doctor appointment today. A few months ago, Eden had an allergy test done and as the doctor was telling me that all Eden was allergic to was mold (phew…she got Vest genes in that dept.) I asked him about some of my allergies. He told me I needed to come in and get an in depth test done…surprise surprise.

In depth, no joke! 74 skin pricks on my back and an ice cube test! It wouldn’t have been so bad if I hadn’t been allergic to so many things. I was trying to find my happy place instead of claw the daylights out of my back. The bad news is that I am severely allergic to all shell fish (so much so that I have to carry around two Epi-pens with me everywhere I go now. Like I need one more thing in my purse.), horse hair, cat hair, dog hair, and dust mites. I have lots of mild allergies including the cold and my own sweat. No, that is not a typo. My own sweat! Apparently my body does not deal well with temperature change.

The good news is that I am not crazy when it comes to itching, sneezing, wheezing and getting hives. The best news is the doctor ordered that if at all possible I should have someone else cleaning my house, especially when it comes to dusting and vacuuming. Seriously, I made sure he repeated that when Damian came to drop the boys off. Wahoo! If that is not an excuse to be paying someone to help me clean the house, then I don’t know what is!

The undecided news is that I am not allergic to any fish. Not quite sure how I feel about that since I have avoided fish all of my life. I am going to have Damian take me to a really nice seafood place and order a mild fish…someday, when I muster the courage. Other undecided news is I am not sure if I want to get the recommended allergy shots. It won’t help the sweat allergy, and I am not around animals (unless you count my wild stallion of a husband) all that much.

The funny news: During the physical exam the doctor asked me when I broke my nose. He was sure I had because of my ‘severely deviated septum’ that makes it difficult for air to pass through my left nostril. (Hence the open-mouth sleeping and cognizant clenching of my jaw to avoid catching stares- or flies, despite feeling like I might suffocate.) I just laughed and told him it was part of my genetic beauty. I am sure he felt stupid, and if he didn’t he should have!

lectures, looks, and cold shoulders...

One thing my husband absolutely LOVES about me is that when I get some project on my mind I have to get it done like yesterday. If you didn’t catch onto the sarcasm, I will clarify; Damian cringes every time I go on a new project kick, which is pretty often, because everything else pretty much gets knocked down on (or knocked off) my priority list.

Well, I have had this wild hair since I got home from Utah. I have been holding back since I realized I probably should unpack, get ready for school, and spend time with my handsome husband. I fought the urge as long as I possibly could, but today it became just too unbearable. Must. Give. In.

My studio needs a makeover (ya think?), and it needs to happen today! Since I had been researching on the sly while I was battling the urge, I had a pretty good idea what I needed to do to get started.

Fast forward a few hours to when Damian gets home. I waited until after he got settled to break it to him gently, “Babe, I would love an hour out by myself.” He reluctantly agrees (surely because he can’t bear to be away from my beauty and radiating energy and has nothing to do with being left with the kids at dinner time). It is amazing what a woman with a mission can accomplish when she is sans toddler and whining children! I breezed through JoAnn’s, Hobby Lobby and Target in an hour and fifteen, (that has got to be a record of some kind), making it home just in time for round two of gently breaking in. You see, I had been looking for some bookcases to organize all my craftiness, and it just so happened that a neighbor was selling some that were perfect. The only problem was, I had to convince my husband to go with me to pick them up…tonight…right then.

We had been there before, so I knew what to expect. Home improvement projects on my timeline and my husband do not get along. I braced myself for the storm. I got nailed with the typical “do we really have to do this right now,” “just because something is on sale doesn’t mean you should buy it,” and “I don’t understand where this came from” lectures accompanied by the looks and cold shoulder. If there was any way I possibly could have avoided his involvement by picking them up myself, you better believe me I would have, but I didn’t think the lady would appreciate me hefting them down her stairs with a girlfriend. And yes, the thought of actually asking someone else’s husband did occur to me, but I thought that would get me all of the above lectures plus the “Are you kidding me?” one.

As we were shimmying down the staircase, you can bet your inheritance that no matter how difficult it was for me I didn’t say a word. We did things his way and by the time we got home he had mellowed. As we pushed them against the wall of my studio, I was so excited about their perfect fit but I felt like it wasn’t the time for cartwheels and my victory dance. Anyways, to make a short story long, I got started on a new project today! I am totally ecstatic, and I have a frustrated but loving husband who puts up with me and my wild hairs.

MORE BIG NEWS!!!

Jeff (most of you probably know him as Bean) got engaged on Sunday! We are so excited for him and Ruth. We haven’t met her yet, but they seem to be perfect for each other from the bits and pieces we’ve heard. When we were in Utah, Jeff looked the happiest I have ever seen him, and when he talked about Ruth he just gushed! That is so unlike Bean, so I knew this was serious stuff, especially when he asked me if I had any jeweler connections!

This past weekend she was in town visiting from Ohio. They got to spend time with Randy, Grandma Vest and extended family on Saturday and on Sunday they took a Harley and rode up Alpine Loop. Somewhere along the ride he popped the question. Her answer was a definite yes and they are planning on being married in October. Congratulations!!! We can’t wait for more details and to meet her in person, but we couldn’t be happier for Bean.

bAck TO sChOoL...

Eden officially started first grade today! She was up last night making her lunch (complete with a shredded cheese and carrot sandwich), packing her backpack (carefully selected and coordinated… “But mom, I really think the light pink notebook matches my binder better than the hot pink.”), and picking out her accessories (sparkly bracelets and clips for her hair). She has had her outfit picked out for two weeks, and even though it was 102 degrees today I couldn’t sway her from wearing her plaid blazer!

While she was getting ready this morning the doorbell rang. Just like last year she got a delivery from the Magic School Bus wishing her a great year in first grade.

Inside were a Blow Pop that said “Be kind to everyone and you’ll be Farney’s Pop Star,” Lip balm that said “For when you meet a chap,” and Nerds that said “Being smart doesn’t mean you’re a Nerd!” But my personal favorite was a package of tissues with a note that said “These are for when you miss your mom!”

She couldn’t figure out how her package got there, but she said someone knew her and must love her! Carter, on the other hand, got a sticker after he screamed through 4 immunizations at the pediatrician and had to watch his sister get on the bus without him. Poor kid got the shaft!

Today was Becky’s birthday and we got to celebrate with her for lunch! Hopefully it wasn’t the PeiWei that we ate that made her break out in hives from head to toe. I am so grateful for her friendship! She is one of those friends who no matter what I have going on after being with her I always feel better. The first time I hung out with Becky, I knew we would be friends forever because she made me laugh uncontrollably. Love you Beck! Thanks for putting up with me and my roadtrips! (The really funny part was that all that dessert was for 6 of us!)

birthday BABE!

If you know me at all you know I have two of the cutest sisters, and today I get to roast…I mean toast...one of them on her birthday...

happy birthday, linds!

So, a few weeks ago Linds (a.k.a. Wein) came with me to take my kids to their swimming lesson. It is initiation protocol for their swim coach, Mrs. Linda, to force any new-spectators to stand at the edge of the pool and let the little kids learning to swim use them as a target to be splashed. This is funny in and of itself because Lindsey hates to get wet. For that reason, I was loving the prospect of watching her get drenched when Coach Linda ruined it for me. Pointing at Lindsey perched on the edge of the pool she looked at me and said, “Is this your other daughter?”

Come on…seriously? Linds is six years younger than me…SIX!

In my defense, the day before at swim practice a little girl walked up at me with a smile on her face and said, “You are so pretty” and walked off. True story, I swear. I guess old ladies can be pretty too.

Anyways, Linds you are a smokin’ hottie and age is your friend (and apparently my enemy), you lucky girl!

LINDSEY IS...

Creative as all get out! Whenever I need to pick a brain, hers is on my speed dial. She is always coming up with cute and clever creations, and you should see her handwriting. Totally safe to say that I have genius envy.

An amazing organizer. When we moved into this house she came to visit and help me organize my kitchen and most of my closets. You should see her craft room! I am currently trying to steal all of her ideas for mine.

Not afraid to tell me that my sense of style is seriously lacking. But the good part about it is she always helps me fill in my wardrobe gaps. I want to just give her a credit card in my name and have her buy two of everything so I can be cool too.

One of the best friends I have

but it hasn’t always been that way. I was the worst older sister growing up! Thanks for hanging in there sis! I don’t know what I would do without you!

Spunky!

She and Jeff are always making us laugh at their quick wit. She is good at taking me to my happy place!

The softest talker I know, the most forgiving of my faults, the best peacemaker, the most natural first time mother I have ever seen,

and the woman least aware in the world of her beauty

and talent. All that packed into her little body- so small that I could have given birth to her when I was SIX…still not over it!

Happy Birthday, Wein!

I love you so much!

MAJOR family announcement!

If you thought this post was going to be all about bouncing Vest baby #4, then you probably haven’t talked to me in the past year…

OUR BIG NEWS:

LANDON IS POTTY TRAINED! Happy day! He was well under way when my dad encouraged me to get him started (with lots of his help…THANKS DAD!) while we were in Utah. Laugh at the picture all you want, I just had to get one of him standing on his tip toes so he can do it - 'wike Carter!'

He has only had a couple of accidents since we started, but we were having a rough time with #2. Anyways today while I was busy (asleep on the couch…shhh…) Landon came running over screaming, “Mom I went poop in the potty!” Wahoo! We immediately called dad and grandpa (who promised to send him a toy when he did the deed) and then he filled his pockets with Starbursts and m&m’s. I feel overwhelmed to be a diaper- less household after almost seven years! Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to wait so long for baby #4!?

Our other happy day bathroom news is that although Landon unrolled an entire roll of toilet paper into the toilet, this time he didn’t flush! When I asked him why he did it, he said, “I didn’t do it. I was just kidding.” How can I be mad after that?

The last time he got in trouble for filling the toilet with paper it actually flooded the bathroom. Thank goodness we own a shop vac! I think it should be required equipment in the homes of everyone with a toddler boy. It has saved us both times Landon flooded the bathroom, and most recently was able to extract 12 pirates out of our clogged shower drain. For your entertainment, I am including pictures of his first bathroom (hallway, entry and part of the kitchen) flooding. However, take note that this incident was caused by leaving both faucets running full force and then joining the rest of us outside for an hour or so.

Are you ready for more happy day news? I got $67 worth of stuff for $8 at the pharmacy! How you might be asking yourself? My good looks and charm, of course! Ok, so it hasn't been that good of a day! (Coupons.) And while we are on the Optimist Express, I was sure I gained at least 5 pounds in Utah, but to my surprise when I got on the scale today I peeked through my fingers to find I had actually lost one! (This is happy news, I am currently not acknowledging the fact that muscle weighs more than fat.) To celebrate, Landon and I walked to the pool where he played and I got to submerge myself in the first chapter of Breaking Dawn. Happy day!